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to hell with us.

by Notebook.

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1.
(Intro) (Verse 1): Fatal Attraction. Jaded Reaction. I've done it all before. (I confess.) I'm out of my remorse. (Got none left.) I don't want to be reborn. (Hook): Things that I can't tell you. I'm sorry, so sorry. Numb to that feeling except when I’m faded, faded. What is Affection? What does it mean? Is it something that I need, or… I wish I could tell you. I'm sorry, so sorry. (Verse 2): Hurt people hurt people. I know. Step aside when I'm down in my hole. Give space while I keep my eyes closed. I don't know want to see shit when I’m… stuck in place like I anticipate. Leave me alone and let me get a break. (Verse 3): Quiet the room and the ambiance can be restored. Air out the tension. Allow my chakras to breathe more. I'm too insensitive to just stop it and recourse. You came for the ride and I am blockin’ the detours. Told you that I’m toxic, to be sure. To this day, we frolic and free-form. Kiss me on my cheek when I am noddin’ asleep… It's still not enough to be satisfied. I promise I need more. Pull me from the depths, but it's hard. You get stressed, knowing that you do your best for the scars. Yet...I say that love prevents any wrongs, then the next second, show that I'm upset when I’m farther… into the comedown. What do I want now? Something to bounce back. I hate when I run out. Baby, you're not to blame. I should be all ashamed. (Hook): Things that I can't tell you. I'm sorry, so sorry. Numb to that feeling except when I’m faded, faded. What is Affection? What does it mean? Is it something that I need, or… I wish I could tell you. I'm sorry, so sorry. (Bridge): Fatal Attraction. Fatal Attraction. (Hook): Things that I can't tell you. I'm sorry, so sorry. Numb to that feeling except when I’m faded, faded. What is Affection? What does it mean? Is it something that I need, or… I wish I could tell you. I'm sorry, so sorry.
2.
(Intro): I’m sorry that you're mine now. (Verse 1): Take my hand. I've got somewhere we really need to go. I’m begging you: don't make me have to step in all alone. I swear, you will enjoy the scenery and what it holds; I’m talking everything you've ever wanted... I promised to deliver, uh; give it all, not give you some. (Chorus): I sense hesitation in your mind, body, soul. Looking upwards hasn't been the best from far below... (Hook): One day, we’ll make it even. Can't break this chain of events. No one told you that you saved a demon. You should've let me die. (x2) (Verse 2): You’ll regret my presence, but cherish permanent memories. Turbulent center-pieces; a perfect, synthetic tease. You wanted something angelic. I was still under fire. Getting soaked in fluid and engulfed with you has been my one desire… Samael. Am I hellish or am I swell? Well, ma’am, I cannot tell. I hit the sky right as I fell... I’m deceptive. Blame the mechanics of life’s Inception. All that you need is on the other side. I’ll guide you, precious… (Chorus): I sense hesitation in your mind, body, soul. Looking upwards hasn't been the best from far below… (Verse 3): I never lead you on. I just dragged you in, but thought you were sure of what's hazardous; used the force of that savage grin. We grew to form an attachment in honor of something sick. Father, Son, and the Mistress. Witch-Doctor drugged us again; improper, but it's efficient… I can't help but make sure you don't go without. We want the pot of gold, so walk along. I know the route. I’m talking everything you've ever wanted... I promised to deliver, uh; give it all, not give you some. (Hook) (Outro): I'm sorry that you're mine now.
3.
(Intro): I don't care anymore. (Verse 1): I don't want to keep sleep-walking to your death-trap. You drain my spirit ‘til I’m starving for a setback. I feel like a lost dog with a rope as a collar on its neck. I won't holler that it gets snapped; but I am not a pet to control. Nobody’s an exception. Your hobbies are suppressive, and I cannot accept who is so invested in grading and testing my role. It's degrading; the pins and the needles. I trip on syringes positioned to prick me [it's evil…]; slip into fetal-position and wish that at least one that sticks in’s a lethal injection. This is deceitful, abusive. Why must I be flawless to people? These humans… swallow my dreams; force me to modify me to make sure I qualify. If it's not the right league that I've got inside, then I promise I’ll leave. Hollow’s my Eve. I’m empty as well. Don't follow my lead. I readily fell. Bravado dying. Maybe I’m too fragile-boned for this, because they all say I've got a nice thing. I’ll sow up these lips and be quiet since nothing I say is a fix for the silence. (Hook): Is that good enough for you? Is that good enough for you? Have I done too much, or far too less? I’m at a loss again. I just cannot win… (Bridge): Is that good enough for you? I think you love cutting through just to see what I will do. Next time, there won't be a next time. Something new… (Verse 2): opiate binges to cope; being senseless. I don't really know another way. clothe me in singes. my hand’s on the stove and I don't need resistance. I’m over what they say. woe and affliction’s the focus of my days. I just want to go with my friends. they're shadows in the distance; gone, and I’m hopeless that it gets better ‘cause it never shows when they're cold and so stiff in the pine-wood box. Are you resting in peace? Is it a blessing to be out of stress and the grief that's infective and bleeds? I am not sensitive. I’m a collective of messes. Need medical treatment. But, I’ll sow up these lips and be quiet since nothing I say is a fix for the silence. (Hook)
4.
(chorus): push and pull; I don't like this tension. discord. that’s my impression. tangling my wires. can't take the misfires. (verse 1): off of the rocker, making a home a psych-ward. something is faulty. I’m in a broken time-warp. I forgot to warn who’s closest. I’m hoarse. I apologize, but know that I’m torn. please understand. there's many inside of me weaving a plan, but who can I listen to speak when I’m antsy; a whisper through the screams & the chants? (hook): let's go on a ride to the edge of all that we could find. hit the gas, be sure to close your eyes. I’ll be… intoxicated on the way to my demise. (verse 2): my lover can see that she’s morphing. I don't know what has become of me. giving my trust ain't a breeze when it's stormy. every word you speak is distorting; feeding the stories. the friends I keep behind corneas give me the solid proof that what I thought was true really was honest, too. everybody’s sneaky. seconds to minutes to hours to days, I’m very suspicious, aggressive, and tense. I don't feel safe; not even in my own skin. that's why I sleep with a blade - plotting when dreaming again… I would dig into the bone; cut the sickness on my own. I’m conflicted and it shows, but there’s rhythm to the flow. nothing looks the same. I notice. hallucinations overlay my focus. I’m trapped within a lunatic’s biopic… mind soaked in psychosis. (chorus): push and pull; I don't like this tension. discord. that’s my impression. tangling my wires. can't take the misfires. (hook): let's go on a ride to the edge of all that we could find. hit the gas, be sure to close your eyes. I’ll be… intoxicated on the way to my demise. (x2)
5.
(Intro) (Verse 1): couldn't be baptized with the common folk. they said I'd need a gasoline-bath, light, and a lot of smoke. my second-death while alive is a rotten joke. I just pray this half-life hits a stop and slows. I can milk it; steal a few more year-longs ‘til I hit another ceilin’. Re-up the feelin’ from the flame, but it's lukewarm… and the tape-worms in my skin are unappealin’. Every sin I've done is buildin’ into a monstrosity within me. Resisting any pity. I just want to slither through the holy land; never hold a hand. Oly Oly Oxen Free. Switching sides. The pact’s price was a sacrifice, and Jehovah’s stance is: my worth keeps bottoming. Giving tithes is me when I’m popped and bleed to death. Head-shot. I need some rest. (Hook): Take my body now. It don’t belong to me. Forget about my Wake and let me fall asleep. The angels in my choir, they can hardly sing, or breathe… Claw marks across the throat; third-degree burns. chop in half the body of the serpent in the church. (Verse 2): I heard that Satan’s a whore. I don't know why I'm so laced with allure. She’ll suck you dry in the name of the Lord. Our relations are more the sensation of war. I’m a reptile from her X-Files. She did me so vile. That's her sex-style. A million ways to die; I chose this grimy, psycho bitch. I’m left stifled. She told me to take my time, and maybe I'll see she's decent. In ways, it just feeds my descent being chained to her needs and grievances. I’m faithless and see deceit is the only communication I’ll be receivin’. My scales are no longer a safe harbor. Don't trust a snake-charmer. (Hook): Take my body now. It don’t belong to me. Forget about my Wake and let me fall asleep. The angels in my choir, they can hardly sing, or breathe… Claw marks across the throat; third-degree burns. chop in half the body of the serpent in the church.

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The pleasantries of romance can sometimes be unhinged, strange, & unusual - and without the company of a companion, roaming over the edge isn't as fulfilling...

Visit this link to hear or purchase "to hell with us" on your preferred platform (will be available on ALL platforms very soon): fanlink.to/NotebookToHellWithUs

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released June 11, 2019

All Production, Songwriting, and Engineering done by Notebook. Artwork done by: Danny Void (www.dannyvoid.com).

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Notebook. Clayton, New Jersey

Notebook. is an Alternative / Hip-Hop Musician that has been breaking down the boundaries between genres for seventeen years, all while putting his graphic, movie-like journey sonically on display. Limitation in Art is not a rule that he abides by, and the extreme highs and gut-wrenching lows of Notebook.'s life-experience is what also makes his work so relatable. ... more

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